1 month of fever

So, since everyone's been asking loads of questions, I thought I'd blog the past few weeks out and explain why I'll be avoiding you like a plague if you're even the slightest bit sick and why my face looks like a huge balloon now.

I had about 3.5 weeks of fever. 3.5 because by mid of the 3rd week the doctors kinda figured it out and brought my fever down. This is basically what happened, but if it's too long you can skip to the part about Still's Disease.

Week 1
Fever and full-blown rashes like almost everywhere. The doc diagnosed me as having dengue and sent me to the dengue clinic at the hospital. Dengue clinic says I don't have dengue and sends me home as having a viral fever.

Not-so-fun fact: Viral fever can be caused by almost any virus and you have to wait for your body to fight it out. There isn't really any medication for it, apparently. 

Week 2
My body starts aching so bad that I can't walk or even turn in my bed. My scalp and skin on my ears start flaking off. Every night is a nightmare because I fall asleep shivering and wake up covered in sweat, and this being almost a half-hourly cycle through the night.

I was hospitalised, a gazillion tests are done but nothing can be found so I'm sent home to fight the viral fever with 8 panadols a day.

Week 3
Everything's the same but the fever spikes to 40.2 degrees. We panic and go to another hospital to see a specialist.

CT scan and blood tests showed that all my lymph nodes and spleen were inflammed and suddenly we're faced with the possibility of lymphoma (which is a scary cancer).
So I undergo a minor surgery to take out 1 lymph node for testing and I get my bone marrow extracted (I still find it hard to believe that I went through this!!!!!! but honestly I was too groggy and tired to even be fully aware of what was happening).

Gross surgical wound. (It's yellow cos of the anti-bacterial cream)

Week 4
I thank God for 4 amazing doctors (yes they also cost a ton, thank God for insurance) who in their wisdom figured this out before all the test results came out. Lymphoma is known to mimic Still's Disease so they had to make a call before starting treatment for Still's.

I got me a PICC because I have small veins and also because the many weeks of tests meant there weren't many places left for them to poke me.

My PICC. Pretty cool huh?

Adult Onset Still's Disease
Adult Onset Still's Disease is classified as an autoimmune disease. A virus triggered my immune system to go crazy and caused my joints and lymph nodes to be inflamed.
It's also apparently named "Adult" because the condition usually only occurs in children.
Still's is a chronic condition, but I've heard that the disease can go dormant after a while and all you need are annual checks! but for now I'm probably going to be on medication for about a year.

Treatment-wise I'm now on steroids which is supposed to flat out your immune system. This is why I can't get sick or have raw food for a while. Steroids also has other side effects like diabetes, osteroporosis and making me real FAT! (I lost all that weight in the first 3 weeks for nothing!)

The docs are slowly replacing the steroid dosage with other meds but so far I didn't react well to the first type of meds hence the slight deterioration in my condition and the extended hospital leave (rarh!). But hopefully the new meds will work! so that I only have to jab myself weekly and not daily.

Dealing with uncertainty and things I've learnt
Uncertainty is a terrible feeling, especially when you're told things like "if it's lymphoma she could go very quickly.", "xxx shows signs of chronic condition", "her white cells are eating her red cells".
These were the longest few days of the entire 4 weeks and very often I found myself just lying in bed wrestling with God about the entire thing, coming to terms with the fact that God is God and I am not. He can so choose to take me away or give me cancer, but that either way He is a good and faithful God.

This is getting really long.. so a quick few things I've learnt

1. God is absolutely real and faithful. Everytime I wanted to give up, He would find some way to remind me of who He is, the strangest example being overhearing one line when Eli was practicing for worship. 
2. It was nice being remembered and prayed for (though I also had issues coming to terms with the whole thing being a big deal and me being one of those people mentioned in the Church bulletin) , but the best forms of encouragement were always when I received smses of God's Word. I would read them over and over for comfort :) 
3. Everyone loves in a diff way. Someone might not ask you much about how you are, but they'll wake up in the middle of the night to feed you panadol, change your ice pack and cook you lunch :) 
4. My family is weird sometimes but really sweet and supportive.

If you would be so kind to pray for me..
Please pray that I will respond to the new meds and get back to normal life soon. If you know me, you'd know that I'm dying of boredom being cooped up at home :(
There's also just one more test left that we're hoping will come back negative for lymphoma so please pray that it will be negative!

and thanks again to everyone who visited and who's been praying for me. I appreciate all of you!

[Update] Week 5
I realised everyone sounds very worried and solemn and all so I thought I'd better list my current situation here.
I'm much better now! No more fever and the rashes have reduced to scars (that should be gone in a couple of months). I still ache but for most days I can walk around on my own and take care of myself. I should (hopefully) be back to work and normal life by 1 Aug though I still can't afford to fall sick till my steroid dosage is 1/4 of what it is now.
(: I'm ok! God is good!